age switch [early May]

[bryanzilla]

Bryan hadn't gotten very far after successfully fleeing to what he assumed had to be safety earlier that morning. He made it a few blocks before he was sure he wasn't being followed, asked an elderly man out walking his dog where he was and how far out that was from where he wanted to be. Like all the answers David had given him, none of his answers made sense and all they did was invite more and more questions.

After that unhelpful interaction, Bryan decided to do what he should have done the second David left him alone in that bedroom the first time and call the authorities. When he'd gone to do just that, though, he noticed that the phone he'd grabbed off the nightstand wasn't his. In fact, it wasn't like any he'd seen before. It took him a while to even get into it, the first thing to greet him once he figured it out being an image of David, that baby and himself in front of a house. The house he came from, maybe. Bryan hadn't exactly stuck around the outside long enough to be able to tell for sure.

He forgot about the phone call, instead helping himself to some random homeowner's bench swing outside their house as he navigated the phone, learning as he went. Call history, text threads, video clips, photo after photo after photo. The phone's memory was jam packed with nothing but him and David and a baby, and yet none of it was ringing any bells in his own memory.

His chest tightened with every swipe, every message he read or video he watched, the growing anxiety nearly suffocating.

Bryan's not sure how long he sat there, how many times he viewed the same images over and over again, waiting for something to click. It never happened, though, and the only reason he stopped is because his phone had stopped working.

Something's wrong. With him, maybe with everything. He wants to cry and he wants to go home. When he knocks on the front door, he's not sure that he wants to go back inside, but he doesn't know what else to do or who else can explain what's happening.

Comments

[bryanzilla]

Bryan cracks a small smile, lifting a hand to his hair and finger-combing it back. It's definitely lacking its usual height, but be did run out of the house not long after rolling out of bed.

"Just over three weeks..." Three great, relatively normal weeks. And here he'd been under the impression that his ex cheating on him with a woman was the strangest thing he'd ever have to deal with in a relationship. "How long have we been married?"

[gaynecologist]

"Three hundred and sixty one days," David answers with little need for math. Time is complicated in Darrow, so they had already acknowledged the date back in April, but David had been clear about wanting to recognise the actual whole year anniversary in May. He hadn't wanted to be robbed of any time with Bryan, a desire that is heavy with irony now.

"Sawyer gatecrashed our first wedding but we got there in the end." He starts shaking his head and wrings his clasped fingers in his lap. It's hard not to take Bryan's hand but he had promised not to touch him. "Oh my God, you barely know me."

[bryanzilla]

"Yeah, and you know me way too well. Assuming it's not a sexless marriage," Bryan counters, drawing his knees up and hugging them. David's not allowed to freak out on him.

"I know you said you'd never get married until everyone in the country had the right to. So either America pulled its head out of its own ass and changed its hive mind or you did."

[gaynecologist]

Bryan's body language shouldn't be as shocking as it is, given the circumstances. David finds it difficult to deal with though, especially when feeling self-conscious around Bryan is a foreign concept. He mutters an apology and drags himself back a bit to give Bryan some space.

"Bit of both." He places his hands deliberately where Bryan can see them, changing his mind a few times before he ends up gripping his knees. "California changed its laws and building a family with you changed my mind."

[bryanzilla]

Taking in a deep breath, Bryan releases it in a frustrated rush of air. He wants a do over of today, to go back to sleep and wake up where he's supposed to be. Or when he's supposed to be.

"So what do we do?" He asks, drawing a blank there, too. Is there anything they can do, or is he just stuck like this? Waiting for David's reply, something behind him catches his attention. Pushing to his feet and leaving the phone to continue charging, Bryan walks over to the mantel above the fireplace and the row of pictures sitting on it. They aren't images he'd seen on his phone, and none of the other people in them are in those other pictures, either. There is one face he recognizes mixed in with the others, though.

"My mother." Holding a baby. After Sawyer was born, it has to be. "...this is real," Bryan says, as if it's just now dawning on him. In a way, it is.

[gaynecologist]

David sits in silence, unable to answer Bryan's question. Surely what they do depends on how long this is going to last. It's too early to let himself even consider the possibility that it's a permanent change, so as soon as the beginning of the thought enters his head, David pushes it away.

He seizes the photo as an opportunity to distract himself and pushes to his feet. "And my mom," he points at a different frame when he reaches Bryan's side, "and...I don't have one of my dad but this woman here, that's Goldie. She was our surrogate and very close friend. And the little girl next to her is her daughter, Shania."

[bryanzilla]

"I'm pretty sure I had a Cabbage Patch Kid that looked exactly like her," Bryan says, looking at the little girl in coke bottle glasses. "Not... recently," he insists, awkwardly clearing his throat.

"Your mom looks nice," he continues. There was one positive thing about this whole ordeal. He doesn't have to worry about either of the awkward meeting the parents dinners if they already happened. "And them?" There's a picture of a tall, glamazon of an African American woman and an adorable baby covered in Post-it notes. Fashionable and functional.

[gaynecologist]

His mom looks nice? There's four words he never thought he'd hear Bryan say.

"Uh, yeah, you two get on like a house on fire," David replies, moving on swiftly. It's not technically a lie. Devastation and destruction tends to be the outcome when they spend time together too. "This is Nikki and her foster mom, Rocky. She was your assistant on Sing!, your TV show."

[bryanzilla]

"I have a show?!" Bryan gasps, annoyed by how shocked by his own future success he sounds. Why shouldn't he have his own show? He's talented. And people who are arguably much less talented than he is have their own shows. Like everything on The CW formerly The WB formerly UPN. "Multi-cam or single? Multi or one season wonder?"

[gaynecologist]

"Uh, multi--multi everything," David replies, lifting a shoulder. Bryan's excitement takes him aback but it eventually results in a smile, probably the first time David has done that today. "Multi-award winning too. You're incredibly successful."

[bryanzilla]

"Wow..." Bryan smiles, looking over all the pictures again. A show and a family of his own? Bryan's barely been in relationships that made it to the nine month mark, never mind nine years. "Everyone looks happy." He wishes he could remember, without being old.

"Suck it, Lance Bass."

[gaynecologist]

"We were," David assures him, looking over the array of pictures. "Very happy."

Maybe now isn't the best time, maybe it's too soon, but David can't keep ignoring him forever. He walks the short distance to Sawyer in his box and lifts him slowly, giving Harvey a pat on the way. "Your turn soon," he whispers before turning back to Bryan with Sawyer in his arms.

"Do you wanna say hello properly?"

[bryanzilla]

Bryan's always wanted kids. If cheating hadn't broken them up, he's sure his and Monty's differing opinions on the subject would have done it eventually.

Wanting them and suddenly waking up and having one is different, though. If he had to rate everything that's happened so far and all the new information he's been give from most to least strange, the baby would definitely be at the top of the list.

He moves to join David, watching the baby for a moment before waving a small hello that the boy returns. Bryan huffs a laugh, then gives the small hand a shake. "Hi... I'm sorry if all the yelling scared you earlier. I was scared, too. Still am, honestly," he admits, though he's not sure why. It's not like he can understand what he's saying.

[gaynecologist]

"I think waking up in a strange place had something to do with it too," David adds. Something else Bryan can empathise with, he's sure. Sawyer reaches both hands for Bryan's one, twisting away from David's chest to get a better grip, chattering nonsense and looking for all the world like he's checking his daddy has all of his fingers. "He's been needy all day."

He bites the inside of his cheek, hesitating before asking. "Would you like to hold him? It's fine if not," he continues quickly, "I thought I should ask. Forget I said anything."

[bryanzilla]

"I've been needy my entire life, so I think I've got him beat there," Bryan says. Although, if David really has been with him for nine years, he probably doesn't need to be told that. Nine hours with him might have given it away. But he is the way he is because of his upbringing. He hopes he isn't repeating the same mistakes his parents made. He wants to be a dad, but is he any good at it?

Bryan shakes his head when David retracts the offer. "No. I mean, not no to holding him. Yes to that. Yeah... Okay."

[gaynecologist]

Sawyer has been okay since Bryan got back but David doesn't point that out. That's too much pressure to put on him so soon.

"Bryan Collins, meet Sawyer Collins." As David passes him over, Sawyer's chatting increases, taking on an authoritative 'pay attention' tone. "Master of the house, keeper of the zoo."

[bryanzilla]

"Omigod, you speak Les Mis." Or it could have just been a coincidence. Bryan will choose to believe the former.

Holding him securely, Bryan looks him over in much the same way he had David earlier. This time, however, he's obviously not trying to pinpoint any differences since they've never met. Instead, he's looking for similarities, things the boy has in common with David. The eyes are hard to miss and just as beautiful on a miniature version of him.

"He looks just like you," Bryan says, smiling at him. "It's nice to meet you, Sawyer Collins."

[gaynecologist]

"It wasn't just People magazine I started following when I met you." David had also channel-hopped to MTV and E! but once he and Bryan had gotten serious, Bryan became his full-time arts and culture news source instead.

"Say hi, Sawy," he encourages, never missing a moment to try and stimulate his progress. "Hi. Hi... We're waiting for his first word," he explains, glancing up at Bryan. "I'm hoping for something complex and intellectual but I'll be happy with anything as long as it's not 'Lady Gaga.'"

[bryanzilla]

"Well I'm doing a great job, if I do say so myself." The baby's current outfit leaves something to be desired, but he hadn't been there to dress him and so the blame is all on David for that one.

"Is that a weird British television show for kids? Like Teletubbies?"

[gaynecologist]

"You don't know Lady Gaga..?" That's like David not knowing what a hobbit is. "She's...just a singer," he explains, completely underplaying her significance in Bryan's life.

Apparently 'soon' is 'now' in Harvey's book, deeming an unoccupied David as fair game. He plants himself down next to him, looking up expectantly. "Nobody important. I mean, she's no Hootie and the Blowfish, know what I'm saying."

[bryanzilla]

"Oh, God, please don't let any of those be his first," he says, covering one of Sawyer's ears in the hopes of keep out all references to Hooties and Blowfishes alike. Nobody wants that. Well, Bryan doesn't want that and that's enough.

"Hello." Bryan looks down at the dog. While still much larger than necessarily, it's much less intimidating when it isn't the first thing he sees after waking up and isn't trying to suffocate them in bed.

[gaynecologist]

It's very Bryan, the way he covers Sawyer's ear to stop him from picking up David's taste. Despite the semi-insult, David takes solace in seeing Bryan's instincts kick in naturally around their son.

"And this is Harvey Milkbone." David nods towards one of the framed photos of Bryan on their couch at home with a tiny Harvey poking out from under an arm. "We've had him since he was a pup. Now he's a bigger pup." Harvey lifts a paw, small barks gurgling at the back of his throat. "The other one you met is Smelly."

[bryanzilla]

"Good name." He picked it, he decides, holding his hand out for Harvey to sniff before giving him a scratch behind the ears.

Dogs. A baby. Today he has a house with a white picket fence, two point five kids/fur-kids and a husband. Last night he had a maybe-boyfriend and probably a lot more than two point five cocktails. It's a lot to deal with, but luckily for him it's all positive, which is making it a lot easier than it might be otherwise.

He wouldn't say no to a few cocktails right now, though.

"Smelly?" David named that one.

[gaynecologist]

"What... I named one, you named one," David replies with a bashful half-shrug, folding his arms. There is something quite unfair about Sawyer being allowed so close to Bryan but David having to keep his distance. But he wouldn't swap places for the world.

"Bryan, I know this is a lot to take in and we don't know what's going on yet, so if you want more time by yourself, we'd get it. I'd get it."

[bryanzilla]

"No," Bryan protests, because he can't imagine anything more unappealing right now than being alone with all of this. He's never done well with being by himself; he hates the feeling. Despite growing up with a pretty big family, it's something he felt a lot. And while he has a vivid imagination and creativity in excess to thank for that now, at the time, he would have just preferred not being made to feel like a stranger in his own home.

"We don't know what's going on, but if anything has a chance of fixing it, it's here." In that room. He tries handing Sawyer back, worried that maybe David would prefer him to go. He did disrupt things earlier that morning by exciting the dogs and making the baby cry and accusing him of murder. "I won't freak out and run away again. I promise."